Francis Ngannou Opens Up About the Grief of Losing His Son Kobe: ‘Feels like you’re missing a part of yourself’
Cameroon’s Francis Ngannou lost his 15-month-old son Kobe earlier this year. The former UFC heavyweight champion, and current PFL athlete, opened up about the loss and the struggle with the process of grief.
Francis Ngannou Discusses Kobe
Speaking in an interview with The Diary Of A CEO, the 37-year-old Francis Ngannou opened up about the tragic loss of his son Kobe. Now, he feels that nothing matters. He said:
It’s something I never imagined. Suddenly, nothing really matters. You realize that you were complaining a lot instead of feeling blessed and being grateful. You were focused on things that didn’t work, but in reality, everything was actually going well.
On losing a child, Ngannou explains the void he feels. He adds:
I’m alive, surviving, but it’s just not the same. I don’t think things will ever be the same. I can’t explain how, in just 15 months, a child or a person can take up so much space and become such a central part of your life. When they’re gone, it feels like you’re missing a part of yourself. Just 15 months ago, he wasn’t there, and now, he came and went, and it feels like a strange, unsettling void.
The hardest part is the powerless feeling Ngannou suffered from. The athlete has had an extraordinary life fighting for his family. As a child, he worked in sand mines to provide for his home. Ngannou left his birthplace and crossed Africa. He spent time in a refugee camp and was later imprisoned. Then, after being homeless in Paris, he began training in combat sports which led to a successful career in MMA and Boxing. He continues:
My whole life has been about fighting to prevent my family from going through tough situations, to avoid feeling powerless or useless. But for the one person I should have fought for, I couldn’t even do that. I didn’t get a chance.
Francis Ngannou On Grief
Losing a child is a heartbreaking situation and Francis Ngannou explains that he was never given to tools how to handle these feelings. He added:
Grief is a process I’ve never learned or fully understood. Some days you deal with it, and some days you don’t. There’s no set process for how to go through it. People handle it in different ways, and it’s hard to know how long it takes to grieve or when it will stop.
The Cameroonian athlete Francis Ngannou would ultimately become a UFC heavyweight champion before stepping away from the organization. Today, he works closely with the PFL as the Chairman looking to launch PFL Africa soon. After two blockbuster boxing matches, he will step back into the cage against Renan Ferreira on October 19.