If You’re Looking for Someone to Root Against During the UFC 81 Undercard…

(Salad-tossing dickface.)

…may we humbly suggest Rob Emerson? As mentioned earlier, the Ultimate Fighter 5 alum faces fellow lightweight Keita Nakamura in the undercard of the event that definitely does not feature Cheick Kongo and Heath Herring. What you may not know is that before he went on TUF — and was submitted by Nate Diaz, lost a decision to Corey Hill in a substitution match, and then was half of a bizarre double-KO no-contest with Gray Maynard — Emerson was a member of the Lords of South County, a roving gang of Orange County rich kids who enjoyed rolling up on strangers and beating the shit out of them. (Imagine the crew from Jackass, but replace “sophomoric sense of humor” with “infuriating sense of entitlement.”)

Check out the following news report, which depicts the June 2000 incident that led to Emerson’s first arrest; he was arrested again this year for unknown (though probably equally assholish) reasons. As reporter Chris Blatchford puts it, the crime was unusual because the gang members “are not from an inner city ghetto or a crime-ridden varrio [!], they’re young people from what their parents might call……..good homes.” Of course, the Lords all turn out to be a bunch of pussies who keep diaries and cry at Titanic (seriously). Anyway, when Emerson isn’t surrounded by two dozen of his boyz, he’s actually not that good of a fighter, so Nakamura should have no problem kicking the shit out of him on February 2, thus rebalancing the flow of karma. Fucking prick.

(Good lookin’ out: MMAJunkie)

Wait a minute, we just realized — Emerson is basically who the bad guy in this movie is based on. So it is kinda realistic!